I think I need a time machine…

Not for evil. And not because I’m a cyborg tasked with assassinating the future leader of the human resistance.

I don’t even plan on going far (I couldn’t live with myself if I caused one of those time paradoxes Doc Brown was forever warning Marty McFly about). And I’m not greedy like Biff Tannen. I just want to go far enough to see the next round of football results, win enough money to give up the day job for a couple of years and catch up on some writing projects, and maybe hire some studio time and a music producer.

So if you know one of those people who ‘can get things,’ kindly point them in my direction. I don’t care how much it costs – I’m good for it  *and if I’m not it’s because you sold me a dud! *

But wait – ‘that’s cheating,’ I hear you cry. And yes, I suppose it is. And I’m sure the suffering we go through now will only make the eventual rewards (yeah, I’m going on the premise there will be actual rewards!) more worthwhile.

In any case it’s irrelevant. No one has invented a time machine yet. And if they did they’d probably go back in time, inadvertently sleep with their mother, and ‘cause a chain reaction that would unravel the very fabric of the space-time continuum and destroy the entire universe…’ 

Thanks for the heads up, Doc! Alarm clock set and peanut butter sandwiches at the ready. I’m leaving time travel to the experts.

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For shits and giggles, let me know what you would do if you had a time machine?